Santa Clause Birthday
Fifth manager and first groupie are on holiday. Spirits high as Hannis picks up Pannis. Foursome sets south. Bears snow and hangovers. Sights along 65 reminds Hannis of six years spent in Lafayette. Two nights jailed in Rensselar. Every sign a memory. He’s the only one who knows Wolcott is wall kit, not wool cot. Fifth manager asleep like Bernie.
Pit stop at Cockery. Where you from? Here, Canada, Poland. I don’t need any of those states. Server/ex parole officer plays customer origin bingo. Healthy helpings of taters, loaf, fried chicken and every starch creation. We gain an hour. Smoke at this table unlike Chicago. Adjacent convenient store a museum of down home relics.
Rensselaer rest stop runs on a windmill not strong enough to keep vending machines at proper temperatures. On the it appears clear walk Hannis wipes. No more stops till Bloomington.
Pannis: This reminds me of Qualicum
Fifth manager: Reminds me of Poland
Hannis: I lived here.
Mr. Haints burns one outside 1918. Appears half his age inked up and shorn. Never seen the place so clean. Same fridge door, salon style gay pig magnets, sexual postcards and David with only one Santa Claus beard and boot left. Peewee's still here, as is Dylan and Ken. Introduced to Lil' Cock. Hear about Black Cock, but he's nowhere to be found. Bertha wants to be included. Her hair drawn in. Suggestive writing abounds. Unsure of the correctness. Mr. Haints insists.
Cutters and students go at it for years. They made a movie about it. We're more cutters. Pannis drives with camera. Hannis in goggles and trunks trying to keep up. Difficult pedaling a flat tire without shoes.
Pushing five we park Walnut. Cinemat's marquee reads Hannis Pannis. Also reads JJ. From Good Times? Dynomite! He holds his mic low above us. We can't be too loud. No dialogue Jake Gylenhaal/Tobey Maguire missing until a half hour before showtime. The only one who can work the soundboard is him. Crowd trickles in. This has come to be known as a Hannis Pannis crowd. Bertha's here, but can't pay cover. Cousins of Hannis drive from Lexington. Mr. Haints, fifth manager, first groupie and lady selling snacks and beer, ready. Alison's Lolita on back screen mouthing lollipops until 8p. Little known vidoes from Pannis and Hannis follow. Hannis turns into Dracula, Poolboy, Mr. Casual, back to Hannis. Pannis plays to two mics elevated two feet from the floor. He is Marty McFly.
Customers of side video store amused. Employees stare through heads. Magnus fades in and out. Charles instructs to turn the camera on audience and play it fucking loud. All withstands this is unscheduled, faith is under the left nipple and breaks down near the end. Tones humans can't handle. Dogs run for the hills. Concession lady goes in the other room. Upstairs JJ holds his mic closer to his mouth.
Mission began as a treacherous road trip to play Mr. Haints his song. Not only is his song played. He also plays in it. Everyone joins in on stage wearing wigs as Hannis Pannis plays one more. Disperse into Bloomington. Youths underdressed smoking everywhere. Pitchers and pitchers of Smithwicks. Hannis finally meets Phil/Owen Wilson/younger Mr. Haints at Blue Beard. Agree over dislike of CAB. Not the case for others singing along to Browneye Girl.
Never gonna be like them.
Fifth manager and first groupie have a room, but no drink nor ice. Bloomington blue laws permit us to buy drink at Marsh. Phil thinks we're gonna be arrested. Back to the hotel. The ice bucket only holds two handfuls. Trash can carries half a bathtub. Tube turns on to Good Times. JJ's looking younger and more expressive. Hannis, Pannis and Phil have to leave. Cross highway on foot. Retire in Mr. Haint's floor. Phil turns off the lights. Leaves TV on cause Mr. Haints is afraid of the dark.
Headaches come early. Break the fast. Goodbye Mr. Haints, I'll be back in three years. Nice to meet you Phil. Bertha out the car window. Leave her as depressed as we found her.
Pit stop at Cockery. Where you from? Here, Canada, Poland. I don’t need any of those states. Server/ex parole officer plays customer origin bingo. Healthy helpings of taters, loaf, fried chicken and every starch creation. We gain an hour. Smoke at this table unlike Chicago. Adjacent convenient store a museum of down home relics.
Rensselaer rest stop runs on a windmill not strong enough to keep vending machines at proper temperatures. On the it appears clear walk Hannis wipes. No more stops till Bloomington.
Pannis: This reminds me of Qualicum
Fifth manager: Reminds me of Poland
Hannis: I lived here.
Mr. Haints burns one outside 1918. Appears half his age inked up and shorn. Never seen the place so clean. Same fridge door, salon style gay pig magnets, sexual postcards and David with only one Santa Claus beard and boot left. Peewee's still here, as is Dylan and Ken. Introduced to Lil' Cock. Hear about Black Cock, but he's nowhere to be found. Bertha wants to be included. Her hair drawn in. Suggestive writing abounds. Unsure of the correctness. Mr. Haints insists.
Cutters and students go at it for years. They made a movie about it. We're more cutters. Pannis drives with camera. Hannis in goggles and trunks trying to keep up. Difficult pedaling a flat tire without shoes.
Pushing five we park Walnut. Cinemat's marquee reads Hannis Pannis. Also reads JJ. From Good Times? Dynomite! He holds his mic low above us. We can't be too loud. No dialogue Jake Gylenhaal/Tobey Maguire missing until a half hour before showtime. The only one who can work the soundboard is him. Crowd trickles in. This has come to be known as a Hannis Pannis crowd. Bertha's here, but can't pay cover. Cousins of Hannis drive from Lexington. Mr. Haints, fifth manager, first groupie and lady selling snacks and beer, ready. Alison's Lolita on back screen mouthing lollipops until 8p. Little known vidoes from Pannis and Hannis follow. Hannis turns into Dracula, Poolboy, Mr. Casual, back to Hannis. Pannis plays to two mics elevated two feet from the floor. He is Marty McFly.
Customers of side video store amused. Employees stare through heads. Magnus fades in and out. Charles instructs to turn the camera on audience and play it fucking loud. All withstands this is unscheduled, faith is under the left nipple and breaks down near the end. Tones humans can't handle. Dogs run for the hills. Concession lady goes in the other room. Upstairs JJ holds his mic closer to his mouth.
Mission began as a treacherous road trip to play Mr. Haints his song. Not only is his song played. He also plays in it. Everyone joins in on stage wearing wigs as Hannis Pannis plays one more. Disperse into Bloomington. Youths underdressed smoking everywhere. Pitchers and pitchers of Smithwicks. Hannis finally meets Phil/Owen Wilson/younger Mr. Haints at Blue Beard. Agree over dislike of CAB. Not the case for others singing along to Browneye Girl.
Never gonna be like them.
Fifth manager and first groupie have a room, but no drink nor ice. Bloomington blue laws permit us to buy drink at Marsh. Phil thinks we're gonna be arrested. Back to the hotel. The ice bucket only holds two handfuls. Trash can carries half a bathtub. Tube turns on to Good Times. JJ's looking younger and more expressive. Hannis, Pannis and Phil have to leave. Cross highway on foot. Retire in Mr. Haint's floor. Phil turns off the lights. Leaves TV on cause Mr. Haints is afraid of the dark.
Headaches come early. Break the fast. Goodbye Mr. Haints, I'll be back in three years. Nice to meet you Phil. Bertha out the car window. Leave her as depressed as we found her.
